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The holidays are a rough time when you are in the middle of a deployment (I’m sure you haven’t heard that before!). We’ve been lucky enough to make it through two deployments without my husband, Luke, missing a holiday up until this year.
I so badly wanted to feel the Christmas spirit in the beginning of this Christmas season. I wanted to feel the joy that is evident in my children’s eyes when they see our Christmas tree light up or the snow begin falling outside or houses decorated with hundreds of lights as we drive by at night. I miss feeling that magic when I was a kid.
Luke was active duty Air Force from 2010-2016 and is now Air National Guard. Throughout all that time when he was active duty, I think we went home twice for Christmas since we lived in Illinois and our families were in Pennsylvania (12 hour drive at least). I remember FaceTiming them during their traditional Christmas dinners we would have been at if we could have gone home and getting all choked up when people started saying We miss you! Wish you were here! I felt lonely then, too, even with my husband right next to me. We both felt a loss missing yet another year with our families and our children missing another Christmas without their grandparents, cousins, aunts, and uncles.